Why does it feel like everyone is getting at me? One of the most common issues we have to deal with as human beings living in communities is “How to respect our own and others boundaries!”
It seems so simple and logical that we would just know how to be respectful of boundaries. However, it is one of the most common recurring themes for many of us. We know when someone has trampled all over our boundaries because we get an instant sense of disquiet or sometimes even a physical gut reaction! Sometimes we lash out and react (leaving us feeling worse!) or we withdraw and disconnect from the person and situation (again leaving us feeling unresolved!).
Boundaries are imaginary lines that surround us and others to define the area that is necessary for us to be the best we can be.
Healthy Boundaries
-
Define who we are
- Are what others cannot do to you or around you
- Are extended by having courage
- Help family and friends respect you more
- Allow you to grow emotionally and developmentally
When Your Boundaries are Weak
-
You feel constrained
- You attract needy, disrespectful people into your life
- You waste energy in keeping life going
So if it feels like “everyone is getting at you!” – here are some tips…
- Commit to understanding your boundaries
- Tell others what you are doing
-
Start with large boundaries
-
List 6 boundaries that you need to have respected
-
List 6 ways you are not respecting others boundaries and STOP
And remember…. Create boundaries with love, respect and caring for both yourself and others.
Working your way through these processes takes courage! Be kind to yourself and feel free to contact Patti, if you would like a Coach to partner you on this journey. (Patti offers a 30minute FREE phone coaching session to get you started).
About Patti Gwynne
